😰 How to not be nervous for a presentation
These 5 phrases will help you get over your fear of public speaking
The writer Mark Twain allegedly once said “There are only two types of speakers in the world: the nervous and liars.” I definitely fall into the first camp. (In secondary school, I would get nervous raising my hand in class, and once, I even played sick to avoid giving a presentation.)
When we hear the phrase "public speaking", most of us think of a TED-talk-style presentation . But public speaking - defined as “the act of performing a speech in front of a live audience” - is actually a much more general workplace activity. It includes giving presentations to your team; voicing your opinion in meetings; and putting your hand up to ask a question in a conference. So it's actually a crucial part of most jobs.
If you're like me, these seemingly "small" public speaking gigs can cause you to sweat beforehand. Still, there's good news. First, it's apparently normal. More than 75% of people get anxious from public speaking.
Second, there are proven ways to calm your nerves. Matt Abrahams, professor of Strategic Communications at the Stanford Business School, gives some helpful techniques in an interview on
's podcast.A core theme in Matt and Lenny’s conversation is learning to “reframe” public speaking situations. Reframing falls under an umbrella of psychological techniques called "cognitive reappraisal". Here’s how reframing works:
You catch yourself having negative thought patterns about the event.
You take a "step back". (This psychological distance gives you space to change how you feel.)
You reframe and relabel your experience from negative to positive.
Same event. Different interpretations. Dramatic effect on outcomes.
In this newsletter, I'll share 5 “mantras” to help you reframe any public speaking situation. These phrases will make you feel positive and empowered, which will help keep you calm and measured.
Mantra 1: “I’m just having a conversation”
Speaking in a conversation is easier than speaking in a presentation. We have conversations every day. Presentations are less common.
The mantra “I’m just having a conversation” encourages you to reframe your presentation as a conversation. It lowers the stakes and puts you at ease.
You can take this mantra further by reminding yourself what you’re bringing to the conversation.
Before you speak, tell yourself: I’m just having a conversation and…
“I have something to share in this conversation”
“I have value to add to this conversation”
“I'm going to get constructive feedback from others about my ideas.”
Mantra 2: “It’s okay to be boring”
When you worry about being engaging and eloquent, your mind fast-forwards into the future instead of staying in the present moment. As a result, you’re unable to fully engage with the people that you’re speaking to.
The “It’s okay to be boring” mantra gives you permission to be dull. Daring to be dull encourages you to strive for connection rather than perfection. Without the pressure, you end up communicating more authentically.
Before you speak, remind yourself: It’s okay to be boring and…
"I'm not here to impress anyone. I'm just here to update the team on the decisions we've made."
"It's okay if I stumble and restart."
"I don't need to be charismatic and charming. I just need to be me."
Mantra 3: “Let’s make this experience exciting”
This mantra encourages you to replace "I'm so nervous" with "I'm so excited". Take a moment to think about the opportunities that your public speech might unlock.
Then, before you speak, remind yourself: “Let’s find ways to make this experience exciting.”
"If I speak at this conference, people might come up to me after to ask questions (which means I don't need to actively network as much)."
"This presentation to clients is a way to show my boss the hard work I've put into this case for the past few months."
"I get to demonstrate my leadership skills if I chair this meeting."
Mantra 4: “It’s normal to be nervous”
This mantra reassures you that nervousness isn't unique or unusual—it's a normal part of the human experience, especially when you're in the spotlight. The 75% of us who get nervous about public speaking includes CEOs of large companies and business professionals too.
Before you speak, remind yourself: It's normal to be nervous, and…
"This nervousness means I care about what I'm doing. That's a positive sign."
"Even the best speakers get nervous. It shows respect for the audience and the importance of the occasion."
"I can use this nervous energy to bring enthusiasm and dynamism to my presentation."
Mantra 5: “I’m getting 1% better”
This mantra centers on the concept of incremental improvement. Each speaking opportunity is a step towards becoming a more skilled and confident communicator. Embrace your progress, no matter how small.
Before you speak, tell yourself: I’m getting 1% better, and…
"Every time I speak, I improve my skills, even if it's just slightly."
"This is a chance to practice and hone my abilities. Each word I speak is contributing to my growth."
"Mistakes are not setbacks but opportunities to learn and get better for the next time."
“All the great speakers were bad speakers at first.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson, poet and author
Public speaking is an activity that even famous and influential people get nervous about and need to practice. At the start of his career, Warren Buffett was terrified of public speaking. One of the strategies he used to reduce this fear is “reframing”. By incorporating these mantras into your preparation routine, you reframe fear into opportunity—making each time you speak a chance to connect, share, and grow.